Our Experiences with Online Dating

Not our photo

Em

I  was so anxious to try online dating at first. I initially tried it because my friend was going to and it was one those I will if you will situations.

I was an idiot and pretty much messaged back anyone who sent me a message. Even if I didn’t find myself attracted to them. That was dumb of me. I remember one guy - we talked a lot and he asked me out. I respectfully (and politely) declined because I felt no attraction. Physically or emotionally. They got so angry and called me names and ranted about how I didn’t know them so I could I know I don’t like them? Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure you can feel a connection online without meeting them. Catfish anyone? It happens all the time.

I was excited and didn’t really think anything would come of it. I wasn’t even really trying to find anyone to be with. I honestly was rooting more for my friend to find one.I was anxious to try online dating. I didn’t know much about it, but I did know a couple people who tried it. A friend convinced me to try it and it was line of those situations of I will if you will. 

I ended up meeting someone and we texted. A lot. We obsessively flirted through text and had great banter. We met up one night when both of us happened to be going to the same club with our friends. It was so awkward. How could we have so much connection online and nothing in person? That’s what I felt. Nothing. We chatted a bit and that was that. We texted a bit more after that and I remember him saying he wishes he had kissed me. I don’t know how he got that vibe. A few days later, he told me he had a girlfriend and it was goodbye. 


I deleted my account on Plenty of Fish and gave up.


A few months went by, and I decided to give it another go. I decided that I really did want to find someone. I didn’t make the mistake of replying to everyone and tried my best, without getting my hopes up. Remember that guy i met? He appeared again and tried talking to me. I told him that I remembered him, much to his surprise. He thought I’d forgot and he’d get a chance because that other girl didn’t work out. Fat chance buddy. Not going to lie, I straight up friend zoned him.

One day, someone messaged me. It was a different message than all the usual “Hey, hows it going?”. He told me I had pretty eyes. I clicked onto his profile and saw that we had nothing in common really. How did he find my profile? It didn’t make sense. I wasn’t going to reply to him, but something in my gut told me to. So I did. We talked and talked. About music and random things. Eventually we decided to meet. We met after work at the mall. We grabbed a coffee and talked. We both were clearly nervous, but it also just felt right. Well fast forward 4 years and we’re still together. 


I’m happy I gave online dating a chance. I’m even more glad that I replied to his message.

I would definitely suggest trying online dating if you haven’t. My advice would be to not be discouraged, be open minded (I ended up with a guy complete opposite of what I thought I would) and always meet in public.

Chris

I decided to try online dating because I was working with mostly only women, most of my roommates were women, and I took esthetics in college, so all of my classmates and teachers were women. It didn't seem like I would ever meet a guy in real life, so I took it online to Plenty of Fish.

At first, I was terrified. Every guy just wanted to meet up at his house. Even when I would try to insist on meeting in public, they would be completely against it, so I knew these weren't the guys for me. I got excited when I started talking to a guy on there that I'd actually had a bit of a crush on years ago, when I'd first went to college. He seemed promising, and we talked non stop, planning a date to walk around and see Christmas lights, until he mysteriously, out of nowhere, broke his leg 10 minutes before the date, and had to cancel, then could only see me at his house after that. I agreed, but before the date was supposed to happen, I saw him out in public, walking around, as fine as could be. What was his plan? To put a fake cast on his leg to fool me? Needless to say, I cancelled on going to his house.

The next guy that I talked to was quite a bit of a larger guy. I had no issue, but he was incredibly embarrassed. He kept warning me that he was even bigger than his pictures showed. We started planning a date, but at the same time, I also started talking to my fiancé. My fiancé and I texted all night, and into the next morning, and couldn't stop talking. I knew I had something real with him, so I had to let down the other guy. It was not pretty. He was convinced that it was because of his weight, and I still feel bad about it, over 4 years later. I hope he found happiness with the love of his life.

I sure am happy that I chose my fiancé though. Who else will go to Build a Bear with me, tell me I look cute when I haven't washed my hear in three days, or watch endless baby animal videos with me? We drive each other crazy, but I wouldn't have it any other way. He's my best friend, and my biggest supporter. I cannot wait to become his bride in September! When dating, online or not, you have to remember to do what's best for you and your heart!

Have you tried online dating? What was your experience like? Let us know in the comments below!

What I've learned about wedding planning

Before I got engaged, I had a completely different idea of what my wedding would look like. I wanted a formfitting dress, a very casual, do it yourself reception, and I wanted my hair down and flowing. It turns out that isn’t at all what the reality of my wedding is going to be. My dress is a big, puffy ball gown, we’re having a catered, sit down dinner, and since I had to cut a ton of dead hair off last year, my hair is going to be half up and shoulder length.

At first I was panicking because everything wasn’t going according to plan. But then I realized that you have to be flexible with these things sometimes. It’s nice when everything fits your vision, but it doesn’t always work out like that. For example, I thought I would save money by having my reception at a community centre in my hometown. Then I found out that there are actually a ton of licenses and personnel that has to be involved in serving alcohol at your own event. The price skyrocketed, and it didn’t seem worth it anymore. Instead of panicking, with a little help from my grandma, I thought outside the box, and now we’re having a dinner at a wonderful local restaurant, followed by a reception at a local art gallery. It’s not going to be what I imagined, but it’s going to be beautiful and best of all, all the serving and set up and take down is going to be taken care of.

I’ve also learned that it’s ok to ask for help. At first, I was determined to do it all by myself. I was going to make all the bouquets, I was going to bake all the pies for the reception, and I was going to find all the containers for the candy bar. It quickly became very overwhelming, and I was shutting down. I realized that when you’re getting married, there are usually tons of people waiting to help you with anything you ask. It really helps de-stress you during what is supposed to be a very fun and exciting time. Don’t be afraid to look for assistance when needed!

Now that I’ve seen that sometimes due to budget, circumstance, and other things out of your control, what you plan for your wedding may not be what you get, I’ve decided to let go and see what happens, and have the best day of my life no matter what! I can’t wait to marry my best friend, and for all the days after, and that’s what matters.

Are there any other 2019 brides around? What’s your biggest wedding planning tip? Let me know in in the comments below!